Happy Feet Friday

8:55 AM Edit This 20 Comments »
My feet are happy, happy today! Flowers AND flip flops! I think I just survived another winter here on the plains.

My favorite mailing came yesterday. The South Dakota Public Health Bulletin. I know you all like to keep up with the statistics like I do. The clap is up by 19 percent and gonorrhea is up by 61 percent. What is up with people spreading diseases? Yuck.

I do have something very special for you today. You figure out what they're testing for, eh? Considering my fear of zombie attacks, this one scares the daylights out of me.

1. Be careful not to destroy the head by gunshot or bludgeoning.
2. The entire brain with brainstem must be submitted FRESH to the lab. Package the brain in a sterile plastic bag placed inside a crush-proof container. Submit to the lab in an appropriate leak-proof insulated shipping container with adequate ice packs to keep specimen chilled. DO NOT FREEZE the brain.
3. As always, the lab will not accept live specimens. Whole bodies, complete heads, or removed brains are all acceptable specimens for submission. Staff will remove brains upon arrival, at no additional charge.
4. Fill out the standard submission form with complete information. It can be downloaded online.

Why this makes me laugh outloud to myself I have no idea. Maybe I'm sicker than I thought.....

20 comments:

BrianAlt said...

It's because there are so few people there. Any movement is bound to be large.

Anonymous said...

Its the winter of course everyone is hooking up and spreading their love diseases!

f.B said...

@justjp: haha. and nothin says "let's stay warm" like the clap

[F]oxymoron said...

No socks!

Nilsa @ SoMi Speaks said...

I love the happy feet transition to spring. It's about time, right?!

melissalion said...

Mad cow. Am I right? Do I win those super-cute shoes you're modeling? I do. I win them, right?

Daisee579 said...

"As always, the lab will not accept live specimens." Best mental image ever from this sentence. Here's my neighbor, can you kill him for me and test his brain? kthanks.

And I love your sandals!! LOVE THEM!

Captain Crab said...

Thanks, Kate! I just spent an hour reading South Dakota Health Bulletins online!

They are testing for rabies and possibly zombies.

Matt said...

Clap is up by 19%?

That sucks.

rachaelgking said...

Flowers and flip flops would make me happy too... if only it wasn't so grey here :-(

buffalodick said...

If I ever see a woman in flip flops, carrying flowers, I will think of zombies!

MsDarkstar said...

Yeah, I am guessing that they're testing for rabies...

And on another note...
Hooray for flowers and happy feet!

Anonymous said...

Rabies. Or gonorrhea. Or possibly reptile dysfunction.

Or zombies.

Jeff

Unknown said...

My vote is rabies or mad cow? Pretty toes, Ladybug!

JoLee said...

"gonorrhea is up by 61 percent."

that's one hell of an increase.

Julia said...

I used to know a guy who's name is Rusty Clap. No joke. Poor guy.

stoogepie said...

Hooray for happy feet and flowers!

This is the right weekend to worry about the dead rising. Very scary!

E said...

Okay your toes look great but I take it all back.
You are not well after all.
Do you love vampires too??????

Anonymous said...

My tulips are coming up and some of my daffodils are too, and I'm just sooooo happy I could pee my pants.

Twinkie said...

Oh... ah... ummmm..... speechless!? LOL