I Drove In a Circle For Ten Hours

1:07 PM Edit This 17 Comments »
Auntie Kate went to visit Baby Z. this weekend. Friday night, I drove five hours from Sioux Falls to Des Moines via Omaha and ended up at Grammie's. Have you ever noticed that at some point when you're driving long distances, you have the feeling that every car on the road is coming at you and the trucks start to seem sinister? What's that movie where the semi trucks and appliances and all that stuff come alive and try to kill people? I never should have watched that.

My brother dragged me from my bed picked me up first thing Saturday morning to go to Yoga in the Park. I loved it last time I went and I loved it again. Well, until I get into it, that is. For the first five minutes, I just make fun of people and take pictures.
And then? I GOT TO SEE THE BABY! When he was first born and I saw his pictures, I thought, "Aw! He's so cute!" but when I took him in my arms? It's like my heart exploded with this deep seated love that I didn't know would ever exist again in my life after the Dead Guy. My soul loves this baby. Is that possible?
Here's where I'm telling him just how much I am going to spoil him and that he can run away to my house when he's a teenager and hates his parents. Because I'm all kinds of cool. Shortly after that, he nuzzled around in the neck of my shirt and started sucking. I know they're pretty righteous and all that, but they don't have the goods, buddy.
My God! My brother is a dad! That is not possible. It just isn't.
On the way home via Albert Lea (hence, the circle) I pondered the fierceness of this kind of love. As well as again - the possibility of moving to either Omaha or Des Moines to be closer to him. I have a wonderful life here full of fun and friends and an awesome recovery community. And I swore I'd never move back to Des Moines. But this is an on-going theme in my thoughts. And usually that means something. My Creator speaks to me in all kinds of ways. Despite the dead bugs on my windshield, the sunset was a sight to behold. Which got me thinking all over again about the wonder that is life.
To get to my nephew at this point, there are several measuring sticks:
334 miles
3 liters of water and a diet coke
1 pack of cigarettes
3 stops to go to the bathroom
1 tank of gas (I'm finally starting to appreciate getting rid of the Blazer)
5 very eclectic cds (Did you know Steve Martin plays the banjo? On the serious. It's awesome!)
5 hours to ponder the meaning of life
1 heart that thinks of him constantly


-Peder said...

That love for newborns really is something, huh?

*Akilah Sakai* said...

New life is a beautifully moving thing. Hence why your blog title rocks!!

The film you speak of is "Maximum Overdrive" I believe.

Allie said...

Wait! Steve Martin plays the banjo?

Also, congratulations on your nephew! He's one lucky kid to have an aunt who loves him so much!

Anonymous said...

"My soul loves this baby. Is that possible?"

Yes. Yes it is. My soul loves three of them, so it is most definitely possible.

I will never forget the feeling of holding my baby girls for the very first time.

BTW, I love the photo of your brother and the baby in silhouette against the window. That one belongs in a frame above the baby's crib.

Jen said...

I absolutely love yoga, I'm so glad you got to experience it outdoors, isn't it great?
And the new nephew? OMG, what a cute, little bundle. I completely understand wanting to move to be closer to him. I know I would.

Malaise Inc said...

I've got an Earl Sruggs album where Steve Martin joins him in playing "Foggy Mountain Breakdown". Interestingly, on the same album Billy Bob Thorton sings "Ring of Fire."

BrianAlt said...

"My soul loves this baby. Is that possible?"

It is so possible that it's even probable! Wonderful for you to learn that.

And to your family I say, Mazel Tov!

Anonymous said...

That is awesome. Congratulations.

Anonymous said...

That is awesome. Congratulations.

melissalion said...

As a mom, I would love more family close to me. Any family close to me would be appreciated.

Babies! Congrats to your whole family!

SoMi's Nilsa said...

I know a lot of people who make the decision to move closer to family when babies are born. Friends move away when they start their own families. And my husband even moved home after his nephew was born. It makes sense, ya know, especially when the heart is pulled the way yours was this weekend!

Ken said...

you look damned happy, kate!

Summer said...

You are glowing with happiness, Girl. This post made me feel all warm and fuzzy.

I felt the same way when my niece was born. She's pretty much hung the moon for me since her arrival on this planet. At two years old, she dubbed me "Aunt Sussie," and that's who I've been ever since. It doesn't seem possible, but she'll be 19 years old this November.

Sparkling Red said...

Yeah, that's why babies are THA BEST! :-)

buffalodick said...

Important to stay awake and alert when long distance driving!

Kristen said...

Oh I know that feeling! It totally takes your breath away! I think you should go and be near him. He's a big deal.

PS: Steve Martin is an awesome banjo player! I thought about him when you said you wanted to play the banjo.

Jules said...

Congrats and I'm glad you got to meet your nephew.

I love that new CD by Steve Martin!