Therapy Tuesday
11:00 AM Edit This 2 Comments »
Carolyn told me this morning that my moods and thoughts have been "more consistent" in the last six months. I think she's right - I have a much better sense of being "me" today. I am getting to know what I like, what I stand for and can actually stand up for myself and my beliefs again. When I lost that? I don't know, but I like having it back to a degree.
And even when I feel crazy? I just feel it and let it pass and come out on the other side just fine most of the time. I think this might be the most "normal" I've been in a long time. Sure, there's always something to improve on or work toward, but I like to focus on living these days - what I can get out of and add to the stream of life.
That's a far cry from where I was a year ago, and even more so the year before that. Now, not that the idea of stopping therapy doesn't strike me with fear and a few tears. (Mind you, she didn't say anything about that - that's just how my head works - right to the fear!) It scares me. It's kind of comforting to know that whatever happens in my life, I will get to talk about it on Tuesday mornings. I guess I'll save the fear for another day, there's nothing I can do with it anyway.
And even when I feel crazy? I just feel it and let it pass and come out on the other side just fine most of the time. I think this might be the most "normal" I've been in a long time. Sure, there's always something to improve on or work toward, but I like to focus on living these days - what I can get out of and add to the stream of life.
That's a far cry from where I was a year ago, and even more so the year before that. Now, not that the idea of stopping therapy doesn't strike me with fear and a few tears. (Mind you, she didn't say anything about that - that's just how my head works - right to the fear!) It scares me. It's kind of comforting to know that whatever happens in my life, I will get to talk about it on Tuesday mornings. I guess I'll save the fear for another day, there's nothing I can do with it anyway.
2 comments:
I have lost my mind from time to time. We all do whether society officially notices it or not. I rather like mine and missed it extravagently when it was gone. I am glad you and yours are reconciling....This year will be better than last.
My psychiatrist told me that if I "stay on this consisten path" that I could start reducing my meds on January 1, 2009. I grinned. Have I mentioned that my 30s are ALREADY kicking my 20s' ass?
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