Slip Sliding Away

8:49 AM Edit This 16 Comments »
Last night, I'm getting ready to make my lunch to take to work and I head out to the garden for tomatoes. I pick a big handful - enough that I have to cup them together and head back downstairs. I know it's hard to picture my apartment, but when you go down there, you see the washer and dryer and the dungeon room where we keep storage. Just like any typical concrete floor disgusting basement. You would never know there was an apartment down there unless you knew where the door was. I live behind door number 3 - in case you ever want to come break in.

So - Gay Boyfriend's got laundry going and there's a big drain in the middle of the floor that I have to walk over. Only this time, I don't walk over it, I slide through the water on the floor, tomatoes flying about the room and land on my tailbone and right elbow. It was classic. Like it happened in slow motion and I couldn't stop it. Gay Boyfriend has heard the ruckus and comes running down the stairs, "Oh my God! Oh my God! Are you okay? Is anything broken?" as he's standing before me ringing his hands. And I say, "Nothing's broken but I'm not ready to get up yet." I had to catch my breath.

I get up and we determine that nothing is indeed broken and I look around for the tomatoes. They are squashed here and there. There are seeds and pulp dripping from my hand - tomato crap. Not blood. Thank goodness. I gather them up and then come back with a towel to clean the rest up and that's that. I put some ice on my elbow because it's already got a knot on it and I start making lunch. I realize that my shorts are wet and figure it's just from sitting on the floor for so long. I stand in front of the mirror to see how bad it is and well - lets just say, I smashed a BUNCH of tomatoes with my ass. I SO wish I would have thought to get a picture, but as it was, I was still kind of reeling from having fallen so hard.

I think we've previously determined on this blog that I am NOT graceful by any stretch of the imagination, but it's been a long time since I've fallen down. So, have a good laugh. I'm totally getting some of those rubber bathtub decals to put on the floor by the drain.

Here's my lunch from the "lean and green" eating plan I've been following. The offending salad that I needed tomatoes for. It calls for lots of lettuce and broccoli, only I don't much care for raw broccoli, so I got cauliflower instead. I lOOOOVE cauliflower. Tuna, tomatoes, onion, and corn. We're supposed to have a small baked potato with supper, but I don't have potatoes and I never eat much for supper, so I threw fresh corn in my lunch salad instead.
And last but not least - see those lima beans? The ones from the pods I was so excited about last week? Um. I got MAYBE 2 Tablespoons of limas out of all those pods. Crack me up! I put them in there too. Then I made a homemade balsamic vinagrette with grapseed oil (ran out of olive and I don't get paid until tomorrow) and balsamic vinegar with garlic, oregano and basil. I don't like to put that in the salad until it's time to eat it. Otherwise, soggy city.
So there you go. Don't fall. It hurts. Also - I've lost three pound since Monday. And my 10K training starts on Thursday. WAAAAAHHHHOOOOOOO!

16 comments:

Jeff D'Antonio said...

I was trying to get a mental picture of your ass with squished tomatoes all over it, but then I remembered that I don't even know what your ass looks like without squished tomatoes all over it, so the whole exercise was futile. And then I remembered that I shouldn't be trying to get a mental picture of your ass anyway (with or without squished tomatoes), so I stopped.

Still sounds like one of those classic moments you'll laugh about for years to come. Glad you didn't break any bones.

Malaise Inc said...

Smashed tomatoes on your ass? Do I need to remind you, yet again, of Rule 34 of the Internet?

Nilsa @ SoMi Speaks said...

You're making me miss the healthy salads I used to make for lunch. Pregnancy zapped my taste for salads, though ... and I'm only just refreshing my relationship with vegetables. So sad...

Lemon Gloria said...

You absolutely rock. Look at that big bowl of fresh deliciousness. And the weight loss! And the training! Yay, you!

Lemmonex said...

Raw cauliflower makes my feel icky, but that looks delightful.

Barefoot Neil Z said...

You ALWAYS have to take the picture. In all circumstances, no matter what. http://becauseallthecoolkidsaredoingit.blogspot.com/2010/04/this-weeks-workout-summary.html

The Good Cook said...

Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! Glad only the tomatoes got broken. I'm also glad you didn't take a picture of the smashed ass tomatoes because that would have freaked me out (just a little)

Holly said...

I wish you could read a book that Claire has where Big Bird sets down his bag of tomatoes and forgets, then he sits on the tomatoes.

All I can think of is Big Bird (this is by no means any reference to your physical appearance) as you relate your story.

Shelley said...

First, I have to say that I'm glad you were (relatively) ok after that fall. They do hurt and man, if you hit your tailbone the wrong way, it is pain-ful!

Second, you made me laugh with your description of the fall and the smashed tomatoes everywhere! You are too funny. I like the idea of getting some bathtub decals for the washer drain - maybe some cute rubber duckies? Have the Gay Boyfriend buy 'em for you, to make up for your unfortunate spill!

Third (yes this is a counting comment and I am the Count), you salad looks gorgeous! I'll be those were the best-tasting two tablespoons of lima beans ever. ;)

Fourth, Woohoo on the 3 pounds!!! You are rocking this!!! Good luck with your 10K training - stay away from dem dar hills.

The bipolaRNurse said...

That salad looks awesome! I love tuna! your dressing sounds so good! Girlie Three pounds woo hoooo!!!! You go girl!

texas math said...

PETA will soon be boycotting you for hurting those innocent tomatoes...with your ass.

kilax said...

Ouch! So happy you are okay and it was tomatoes, not blood!

Yum. That salad looks good. Congrats on -3!

Have fun tomorrow! :)

Kelly Hogaboom said...

That food looks delicious. & I'm glad you're not seriously hurt.

& "lets just say, I smashed a BUNCH of tomatoes with my ass" is just about the best sentence I've read.

melissalion said...

That sounds like a bad fall. And it totally was. GB should have mopped everything up!

Holly said...

Forgot to mention that Gay Boyfriend should by some 3M product (hint, hint, nudge nudge) to avert any future falls near the drain.

Jen said...

Ouch! Did you get bruises? I bruise like a peach so it would be immediate for me.
3 lbs, more running and tons of veggies? Girl you're gonna be in the best shape of your life!