Wednesday, Wednesday

7:11 PM Edit This 1 Comment »
My co-worker won an office party for 20 at the bar for tomorrow night. I laughed so hard - it's just the two of us in the office! She called her family and friends and I'm the designated driver. I asked her why she couldn't have won the free teeth whitening instead! It should be fun, I've been venturing out a lot more these days. I feel more comfortable in my own skin I think.

By the time I moved to South Dakota, I was a complete recluse. Granted, I went to work at the church every day and managed to put on a good face there, but when all ewas said and done, it was off to the liquor store, draw the drapes and that was a night. Every night. The same. I've done more in the last year and a half than I have in the last five years I think. My co-worker, Tami and I have been voraciously planning camping trips, signing up for the motorcycle safety classes and devouring the internet looking for a new tent for me! My calendar is so full of scribbles and question marks and possibilities that I can hardly read May, June, July and August. My life is full! Who would have thought?

The club kind of has a pall on it these past few days, thinking about our friend that died. Some are more affected than others. Today I am the strong one and can give direction and compassion. I don't know what the funeral will bring, but for today - I can only be thankful that I have sobriety and a life full of love and happiness. I never want to go back to how it used to be. I'd rather die. And the fact that some still choose that option frightens me.


GreenCanary said...

I'm so excited for you, and proud! Getting out and living can be hard. I know that firsthand! I am still working on getting out and doing, and it's a struggle every day. But seeing a chock-full calendar? SATISFYING.