SNOW DAY
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Yesterday:
Today:
I LOVE spring in the Midwest! We're supposed to get up to 10 inches. It brings back memories of last year's March snowstorm. I had been sober about two months, had just started my new job and we had a wicked snowstorm. Well, everyone in my office lives in small town, SD, so they closed the office at noon that Thursday and said we'd stay closed on Friday.
Normally, wouldn't something like this make you giddy with glee?
Yeah. Not so much. I sat in the parking lot in my car, sobbing. It's a SNOW DAY! And what do you do on snow days? DRINK. And drink a lot. Because you have no where to be. Hot chocolate with peppermint schnapps. All kinds of Kahluah and coffee concoctions, you get the drift. So I'm sitting there sobbing. I refused to leave the parking lot until I had made a decision. Drink - and start this sobriety thing all over, or ask for help.
I drove to the clubhouse and there was a 15-16 year old kid sleeping on the couch. No one else. I thought, "I'll wait a half hour. If no one comes, then I'm drinking." Well, what do you know? People start pouring in, coffee gets made, we're playing games, I'm cruising around picking people up to bring them to the club in my 4 wheel drive superiority, I stay for the 5:30 p.m. meeting and decide I'm fine. I'm ready to go home.
I drive away, and that's when it hits. I don't have to get up in the morning. And if you don't have to get up in the morning, what do you do the night before? (Especially if you're an alcoholic.) You DRINK. One more test for recovery. I'm going to drive to the church meeting and if there's nobody there, I'm going to go to the liquor store and call it a night. Well damn them all, one of my favorites, a man whom I affectionately call my recovery dad is there with his wife and another couple.
I walk in and immediately burst into tears, "It's a snow day!" Suddenly, I'm getting hugs and come on ins, and it's going to be okays. And it was. It really was. My partner in crime that got sober the same time I did - Doug - showed up about fifteen minutes later with the same expression on his face and said, "It's a snow day!" We've been friends ever since.
Today, it's snowing and the city's shutting down and I'm leading a meeting at 5:30 p.m., going to dinner with a bunch of people and then heading over to my sponsor's like usual. What a difference a year makes. I'm not even close to crying about it. I love the snow. And I love my life. And today I don't have to drink on snow days just to get by.
Today:
I LOVE spring in the Midwest! We're supposed to get up to 10 inches. It brings back memories of last year's March snowstorm. I had been sober about two months, had just started my new job and we had a wicked snowstorm. Well, everyone in my office lives in small town, SD, so they closed the office at noon that Thursday and said we'd stay closed on Friday.
Normally, wouldn't something like this make you giddy with glee?
Yeah. Not so much. I sat in the parking lot in my car, sobbing. It's a SNOW DAY! And what do you do on snow days? DRINK. And drink a lot. Because you have no where to be. Hot chocolate with peppermint schnapps. All kinds of Kahluah and coffee concoctions, you get the drift. So I'm sitting there sobbing. I refused to leave the parking lot until I had made a decision. Drink - and start this sobriety thing all over, or ask for help.
I drove to the clubhouse and there was a 15-16 year old kid sleeping on the couch. No one else. I thought, "I'll wait a half hour. If no one comes, then I'm drinking." Well, what do you know? People start pouring in, coffee gets made, we're playing games, I'm cruising around picking people up to bring them to the club in my 4 wheel drive superiority, I stay for the 5:30 p.m. meeting and decide I'm fine. I'm ready to go home.
I drive away, and that's when it hits. I don't have to get up in the morning. And if you don't have to get up in the morning, what do you do the night before? (Especially if you're an alcoholic.) You DRINK. One more test for recovery. I'm going to drive to the church meeting and if there's nobody there, I'm going to go to the liquor store and call it a night. Well damn them all, one of my favorites, a man whom I affectionately call my recovery dad is there with his wife and another couple.
I walk in and immediately burst into tears, "It's a snow day!" Suddenly, I'm getting hugs and come on ins, and it's going to be okays. And it was. It really was. My partner in crime that got sober the same time I did - Doug - showed up about fifteen minutes later with the same expression on his face and said, "It's a snow day!" We've been friends ever since.
Today, it's snowing and the city's shutting down and I'm leading a meeting at 5:30 p.m., going to dinner with a bunch of people and then heading over to my sponsor's like usual. What a difference a year makes. I'm not even close to crying about it. I love the snow. And I love my life. And today I don't have to drink on snow days just to get by.
5 comments:
Yay!!! What a great post!
It's snowing here too but I don't want it! I want SPRING. Hmph. (although it is quite pretty snow)...
I'm ready for spring, but still like a fast snowstorm. It'll melt fast!
Oh, what a neat post. I always want to drink when it snows - hot chocolate, mocha coffees, sugar teas...
If it snows too much Kyle will have to plow tonight. How silly when it will all be melted tomorrow...
You're my hero :-)
Yay you!
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